Saturday, May 21, 2011

On This Day, in a Year That Shall Not be Disclosed

Like most little girls, I was precious, sweet, smart, and a little, shall we say, opinionated. Hmm, reminds me of a little boy I know...My mom really never had to tell me to clean my room or do my homework. I just did. Like most teen age girls, I battled my mom occasionally on rules, and there was one incident that resulted in me being grounded for a month w/o driving privileges. For the most part, I didn't really become a hard, stress causing, heart attack causing potential until college. Then, I really made up for a pretty well behaved childhood.

I think most mothers and daughters have their rocky years. I do not know if my mom and I have more or less than normal. I do know she is the best mom anyone could have, even if I didn't always know it.

When I was young, my mom worked 2nd shift as a RN in ICU, and often picked up every OT shift offered. I was about 13 when she switched to the Same Day Surgery Unit, and 1st shift hours. My mom often says she wishes she had those hours when we were younger. I don't feel I missed out on anything, but I am sure she has mom guilt about time spent. She shouldn't, she raised two outstanding (well, pretty good) kids.

Needless to say, I remember my mom coming home at midnight only to leave again at 5am for another shift. I remember Kelly (our babysitter for at least a decade) just heating up our dinners. It wasn't until I was much older, that I realized my mom cooked those meals in the early morning hours, so Kelly just had to heat them up. I am pretty sure my mom cried when Kelly found a "real" job.

I guess when you have two small children and you want to give them the best, your work ethic takes over, so your checking account can do what you need it to. My brother and I were spoiled, although at the time I don't think we knew it. I don't remember wanting for anything: I had the "in" shoes, the "in" back pack, the "in" headbands, we went clothes shopping every summer, and I don't remember "Santa" disappointing. Actually, to show you just how good "Santa" was to us, I know I didn't get a Cheer Bear Care Bear because "Santa" couldn't find one. I remember this to this day, because in all honesty, it's probably the only thing I wanted that I didn't get. My mom remembered it too, because several years ago I received an over sized Cheer Bear Care Bear.

I became fully appreciative and fully aware of my mom's sacrifices when I became a mother. I had always known what a good mom I had, but I didn't realize what an exceptionally outstanding mom I had until Gabriel was born. I remember having so much pain after my c-section (I prefer pain to the nausea prescribed pain pills cause me) that I told my mom I was afraid I wouldn't be able to move quick enough, if say, the house caught on fire. My mom just folded the baby clothes she had washed for me and said: "yes, you will because that's what a mother does. You won't think about the pain if you have to protect your baby." I realized for the 2nd time in a week that I was her baby. The first time I found myself doing laundry at 2am, I wanted to call her and say guess what I am doing? I knew she had done the same.

When I applied to graduate school the essay topic was simple: Why Do You Want To Attend This Program? My response started: Each generation wants to do better for the next, each parent wants to provide more than they had. Let me tell you about my mother.

Happy Birthday, Mom! I love you.

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