Sunday, June 19, 2011

Seriously, My Dad Can Cook and Sew

I didn't grow up in a two parent household, but I grew up with two parents. I wasn't the only child in my grade school to have divorced parents, but it wasn't until I was older that I realized some kids only had one parent. Normally, that one parent was the mom. Dads often seem to get a bad reputation in the world of parenting. This never made sense to me because I had a dad, a very present and loving dad.

There is a commercial, where the stressed dad tries to make a hotdog in the microwave because his wife isn't there and he isn't sure what to do. The hotdog is inedible. I hate this commercial and I find it insulting to mankind. My dad didn't buy microwave dinners and take us to a fast food place to eat. My dad cooked for us and we helped. Some of my best soups are ones he taught me to make. Just like my dad, I have a hard time telling others how to make these soups because a pinch of this and a dash of this, doesn't help someone who wants measurements. My brother has a special green bean recipe he created when he was 8 with my dad. My dad tried to teach me how to bake, but somethings are just not teachable in my world. If you want a cake, don't come to me.

My dad didn't look at a vacuum cleaner in a confused state of mind or at a sponge wondering what it did. He knew what these things did, even if he didn't like to use them. This is probably why we had chores!

I only know one person who can sew by hand as well as my father, and that's my husband. They can both have 5 buttons on a shirt while I'm still on the first button. The two of them probably have more in common than either would like to admit. For example, neither has really taught me to sew. Guess they will just have to keep doing it for me.

My dad and I have always been close. As I have gotten older, we have had our battles, we are both stubborn people who are always right. But despite or perhaps because of this, I will always be daddy's little girl. He taught me to pay attention to my surroundings, to not be afraid no matter where I was, to walk with my head held high. He taught me that I could be anything I wanted to be if I tried, no matter what anyone else said. My dad taught me feminism. He showed me a different part of life, the part where people don't always have everything they need, let alone everything they want. He taught me to care for others and as a result I developed an empathy for people that sometimes causes me to be very "save the world".

I never understood the fathers and the mothers who leave. I never understood the fathers and mothers that can't or don't. Yes, people I said "and mothers". Look around today and you will find that many children, who have only one parent, only have a father. Perhaps, the marketing departments of the world need to catch up on that.

Was my dad perfect? Of course, not. Does he have his faults? Of course. Like most adults I don't look at my parents with rose colored glasses, but their mistakes and their mishaps have helped shape me as a person. I had a good example as to what a man should be and shouldn't be. Perhaps, my dad wishes that he didn't teach me a lot of the shouldn'ts, but without those, I wouldn't have been able to step out into the world as a woman and take care of myself.

Now as a parent myself, I get to see my father be a grandpa. I am glad my son has the time he has with my dad. I sometimes get frustrated and wish he would do more of what I ask, but in the end I turned out pretty near perfect (stop laughing)...the time my son spends with my dad will only serve to make him a more well rounded individual. Some lessons are priceless. I wouldn't be the person I am today without the dad I have, with all his positives and negatives.

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